I am in the last 5 week of my second pregnancy, woohoo! So I thought I would share a little of my professional knowledge as well as my personal experience with self care and food freedom during pregnancy (which is very much one in the same.)
First of all it is important to keep in mind that everybody is different and every pregnancy is different. My two experiences have been about polar opposites. That being said, it is important to keep in mind that wherever you are on the spectrum of crazy pregnancy symptoms, you’re doing your best and that’s all that matters! Also, trying to compare yourself to others will just lead you feeling defeated or sorry for yourself, which is not the point.
You are creating a human life. That’s amazing! And if this is you, Congrats!
Whether you have been trying to get pregnant for long, got pregnant right away, or had quite a surprise, pregnancy is an easy time to fall deeply into health and wellness culture (myself included.) It just makes sense, we want what is best for our baby and our body to be able to create it.
The problem comes when this leaves you feeling miserable over a toilet seat or guilty for not being ‘better,’ especially in that first trimester.
So here’s some advice:
Keep your expectations reasonable and flexible.
I am here to tell you most of my first trimester I was unable to even think about a vegetable without gagging. My first pregnancy I couldn’t even look at raw meat to be able to cook until I was 30 weeks. It is okay!
If you go into your pregnancy telling yourself about how healthy you are going to be and building that pressure on yourself you are going to create unnecessary stress and guilt when things just don’t go your way. Now, you might not have any symptoms or only have them for a few weeks (lucky you!), but it is still important to be aware of the diet mentality that is trying to sneak in in the name of ‘health.’
Nausea can really make you feel like you’re not caring for your body. You may not be able to eat when you feel like you need to or you might be repulsed by all but a select few choices, and you are still able to support this growing baby. Taking a prenatal vitamin, which is recommended by all doctors, can give you some comfort in knowing that you are providing your body with nutrients even if you can’t keep anything down. For me it worked best to take gummy vitamins when I was extremely nauseous and a pill form when I felt a little better, but it is whatever works best for you!
Nourish your body the best you can when you can.
A note on body image
Even if you are pretty far into healing your relationship with food and your body, weight and body changes during pregnancy can be so, so difficult.
I hear you, you have no idea how your body will change or how it will be after the baby is born. The unknowing can be so challenging.
Unfortunately many providers still focus on weight as a health measure during pregnancy. If this is triggering for you, I encourage you to be prepared to have a conversation with your doctor about how you do not want to discuss weight and make nurses aware that you do not want to see/know the number on the scale.
Also, weight gain during pregnancy is not something that is simple. Again, everybody is different. The scale providers go off of is based on BMI, which I hope you know by now is total BS (and based on white European males.)
My first pregnancy was a very liberating time for me because it was the first time I was able to let go of total control of weight and was forced to accept that my body knows more than I do. Your body was built to create this life and thinking that you know more than it does seems kind of silly. Working towards this truth can take daily affirmations, but I hope it is as liberating to you as it was for me. (I’ll post about postpartum later, that’s a whole ‘nother ball game with diet culture!)
Cravings, food aversions and more cravings
You can try and justify cravings all you want. Sometimes they make sense and sometimes you just can’t get enough of that Captain Crunch cereal that you haven’t had (or wanted) in 15 years. Honoring your cravings (as long as they are safe) is a lot like when you first start working towards food freedom and allowing all foods unconditionally. You might feel a little out of control at times, but restricting will lead you to feel even more out of control or lead to binges and guilt.
This pregnancy I ate so much cold sauerkraut you wouldn’t believe it, but it’s loaded with folate needed for pregnancy. And the Captain Crunch, which was also very real and lasted a few weeks had some iron and I usually had with milk, which could provide more energy, fat my body needs and vitamins and minerals.
Taking comments from others
You will hear it all from everyone. People lose a filter with pregnant people and I have never quite understood why. You will get comments on anything and everything you eat and how your body looks all throughout.
This time I got comments from my husband’s aunt about how swollen my ankles were (when they were not swollen at all.) I’m sure she felt awkward when I looked at her and said “no these are just my ankles.”
Anyways, it will be frustrating hearing comments and setting boundaries with strangers in the elevator may not seem worth it. So, prepare yourself the best you can with affirmations, have return comments you are comfortable with ready at hand, and set boundaries with people you are comfortable with early on. I find setting boundaries either before any comments are made or quickly after the first comment can be the least painful.
If you, like me, have grandparents or other friends or relatives who have no filter, have people on your team. For me I am very open with 2 of my family members about how I do and do not want to be talked to during pregnancy, postpartum, etc. This makes it so I am not the only one redirecting conversations or shutting down comments.
Any questions, comments or concerns? I would love to hear them!
